Contemplating Concierge Medicine

I have been with the same primary care physician for the last 8.5 years. I found her by referral and honestly fell in love with the way she practiced medicine. It ALWAYS appeared she had all the time in the world when we met. Never was she hurried nor did she pass me off to another health care provider. She typed notes in my chart while we talked. She remembered everything from the year before and prompted me with questions to ensure I had not forgotten anything since our last visit. She would ask about my children, my job, and she would share her own life stories. She always made me feel at ease, welcome, and as a friend. She seemed to treat ALL her patients this way.

So when I received the letter last month that she planned to move her practice to a concierge model by the end of the year, my stomach turned and honestly, I felt ill. Luckily, I had my annual visit already scheduled within the week so I could add the concierge concept to my list of questions. I started going through the pros and cons of signing on with her.

Pros: (1) I have been with her for the last 8.5 years. She KNOWS me. There is something to be said about that when it comes to your health. (2) she would be available to her patients 24/7 via cell and email. WOW, what’s not to like about that? Though I only see her once a year now, I do see the urgent care doctor on weekends several times a year. (3) she will carry a smaller patient load that will allow her to spend a minimum of 1 hour with each patient annually, and 30 minutes if needed for other appointments scheduled throughout the year. Of course as I mentioned above, she ALWAYS spent time with me or maybe that was just my perception. (4) If I had family or friends in town visiting who needed to see a physician quickly, she would be available. Much like the family doctor I grew up with. What’s not to like about that? (5) Direct assistance should I need to be referred to a specialist, i.e. navigation to the best doctor, not the required doctor.

Cons: (1) This service is going to cost me $1,800/yr. (2) I only see her once a year now for the BIG stuff so is it worth the money for that one time? (3) my family all live on the same street as me, so no one is coming in to visit that would need a doctor for an emergency, so that ‘service ‘ is not something I really care about. (4) Referral, i.e. navigation assistance would be nice if I needed it but overall, my health is pretty great. So, is it worth the $1,800/yr. for something I probably won’t need? And, shouldn’t a doctor refer me to the best doctor anyway, not a required one?

Inc. Magazine Honors Concierge Medicine

If you search Google for ‘concierge medicine’ you get more than 8.7mil hits. News articles are just as impressive on the search results. I have a personal physician friend in San Antonio, TX that has had a concierge practice for more than a decade and LOVES it. She raves about being able to spend real time with her patients. If she has not seen them in a while or knows they were due for lab work or checkup, she calls personally to talk to them. She knows when they have been admitted to the hospital or have had a life event change. She spends her time with each and every patient which showing that her business model is providing quality outcomes. It reminds me of the family doctor I had growing up.

The model must work. The number of physicians moving to concierge medicine is growing at rapid rates. The number of articles on ‘physician burnout’ pop-up daily, just like this one from NPR listed below, so physicians want something different. I want something different. Health systems are struggling with lower reimbursement, I’ve seen my bill with some providers as I get that pass through on those changes. Narrowing of networks, mega mergers, patient dissatisfaction on the rise, increased paperwork, decreased transparency, and a host of more negatives goes a long way in why patients, like myself, will give serious thought to signing on that dotted line to pay the added fee for quality time & care with my physician. Contemplating a concierge model for my care just got clearer.

What are your thoughts on Concierge Medicine? Is this something you have contemplated for your own care?

Physician Burnout? Or just miserable?

One Week, One Goal

I’m on a countdown to my 50th birthday. As you can see at this publishing I approximately 11 months out til I hit that magical number.

At first, I won’t lie, I cried. I turned 49 and thought to myself ‘I don’t feel 50….50 is old right?’ I used to think that like most arrogant teenagers, 20something and even newby -30 yro. Then, I took a breathe, then another and when I opened my eyes my son was staring back at me perplexed at what I was doing. I smiled, he smiled back and then slowly walked away looking at me with what I would describe as funny trepidation. It was at that moment, I decided when I turn 50, I want to be the version of me possible. I want to kick off this second journey of life knowing I entered with a healthy mind, spirit and body. My kids are young and I’ve done the math when then start/finish college. I’ve done the math on possible marriage for them and if I am lucky to see their children born. I want to be around for all of that but I won’t be if I do not enter this second half the way I need to.

So, I embark on this 1 week, 1 goal challenge for myself. I was happy I accomplished 2 in the last 6 days (1+pounds and wrote this blog). I know I will not always have more than 1 goal reached, but that is not the goal. Only 1 goal each week. If I can do that, I will have obtained more goals accomplished than any New Years resolution, I’ve ever tried.

Imagine what you could accomplish if you just told yourself 1 week, 1 goal….1 goal, 1 week! It’s a small step but a step no doubt. Sometimes, that is the hardest, scariest and biggest step to overcome. Take the challenge with me!

Grab a notebook (I bought a $0.97 composition book at Office Depot). If you are super creative you can give the inside page a beautiful title. I’m not creative, my first page went right to the point. At the top center write today’s date. Skip a few lines and write out your 1 Goal for the week. Skip another line to two and place the date for the accomplishment. Skip another line and write the title Barriers. Now answer HONESTLY do you have any barriers to accomplishing this goal? Is there anything holding you back. Probably not is the answer. But for the sake of planning it’s always good to write it out. Now, what are one to five things you can actively do to accomplish this goal? Think reasonable, economical and let’s face it, actionable things that will work towards this goal. After all, the goal is but one and it will benefit you greatly by taking this step.

As you can see with my horrible handwriting, my goal is simple, my barriers non, my to-dos manageable, actionable.

Now, since I am a frugal gal, I plan on using both sides of the paper in my book. Plus, it makes it easier to reflect what was done and allows me to focus on the next 1 week, 1 goal.

On the back page of my goal, I write out what I accomplished. Did I reach my goal or more? How do I feel? Did I accomplish more than one goal? Fill in as much as you want here. There have been many studies on the benefits of journaling (Positive Journaling) so write whatever is in your mind for those analytical thinkers or in your heart for those creative souls. This does not need to be a novel. Keep it simple.

Now, we are ready for week 2! Check in next week for more updates!

Is Mental Health Lost?

It has been 4 months (hard to believe) since my cousin, Kenny, succumbed to the darkness that clouded his mind. In the middle of the night, he could see only one way out of the pain and in his mother’s home, took his life. I wanted to write about it, but honestly, was not sure how long I could write until I would break down in tears and overwhelmed with loss. Even now, as I embark on this blog, I hope to keep my head in the game to write.

As an only child, my cousins are the only ‘sibling family’ I have and the loss of one in our small group has been quite the journey I was not prepared to take, at least not yet. Oh, there were the unspoken

words or words spoken quietly, we thought the day would come, but always prayed and rejoiced when one day passed into another and he was still with us. After awhile, I think we started to push the thought further away as we entered 1.5yrs of sobriety and seemingly healthier mental states. Don’t get me wrong, we were not delusional to think the darkness that plagued him was not there. We all knew there were good days and bad days. But, he seemed to fight through the bad days easier as time went on. We noticed a vast improvement when he moved in with his sister and they were making a life together. He helped her around the house, got a job that provided healthcare and she so enjoyed having her brother nearby as her son had moved out once he got married. All seemed right in the world, or as much as it could be. The sails were righted and we were all coasting, enjoying the calm ride. Or at least we thought.

I was at work when I got a call from my aunt and then an immediate call from my cousin, Carey, telling me he was gone. I remember walking outside, frantically trying to reach my mother. I misdialed several times because my hands were shaking so badly and the tears were clouding my site. I paced back and forth thinking, ‘What do I need to do? How can I fix this?’ Then suddenly it hit me, I can’t fix this, he’s gone. It’s over and he is not recovering from this round. I remember calling his sister and hearing the heart break in her voice, the desperation and loss. It was then I wished so desperately to be there with her. She had lost her brother, her friend for the last 40+ years. I went into auto pilot, stopping the tears and thinking of what needed to be done next. I went home, packed a bag and with my parents in tow, we headed out west the next day to be with the family. All the while, I was pushing the fact the mental illness he was plagued with had finally won.

The following couple of days, I tried to rationalize his death. Even going so far as we ALL do in grief, saying ‘he is no longer in pain’. But was that the right message to send to myself? To his family and friends? We laid my cousin to rest and yes I say rest, because I pray he found clarity and peace in the after life, still noting was that the right phrase to use and to tell myself and then we went on about our life in the weeks that followed. After a month, I wanted to write about mental health but still found myself overwhelmed at his death. I tried and failed, as I broke down in tears sitting at my computer. The screen swimming in front of me and the grief making me sick. The following month, I was angry. Angry at the circumstances and people that helped push him into the darkness. Angry that he could no longer fight. Angry that he took the path he did, and again gave myself the out, ‘he’s no longer in pain. He has found peace’. The third month came and I felt lost on what I would even say. Mainly, because, I’m not certain that mental health is truly something that we as a society WANT fixed, so why write about it. Now, with that statement alone, I’m certain that someone somewhere is offended and shocked I would say such a thing. But, let’s look at some social structures regarding how we approach life. We have given ourselves the calming statements over and over, ‘he is no longer in pain, he is at peace now.’ Or better yet, our so called structures and values of life diminish each day with the passing of some new politically correct savvy catch phrase. I think you have to talk about that before you can talk about finding ways to treat mental illness. This topic is not for the ‘government’ to decide but we as a society have to start truly asking ourselves how far do we push the envelope when we dismiss a death, ANY death and what constitutes life and fighting for it.

There are many aspects this conversation can dive into, like starting with the conception of a life itself. But, for the time being I’ll leave that one alone and talk strictly about our societal changes regarding death and the right to end a life no matter how big or small. You can Google assisted suicide and get over 800k results. Google ‘what constitutes life’ and get over 36 mil responses the first being ‘the definition of life is controversial’. That alone is terrifying. We have made life controversial. This is not a left or right thing, a Democrat vs Republican thing, this is a HUMAN thing. How can we begin to address mental health when we have made life itself controversial? The website, AssistedSuicide.Org goes into the push to allow those suffering from mental illness to seek out someone to help them end their life. Now, for those that say it will never happen, that is the same statement made for assisted suicide for the terminally ill and yet, here we are, with 6 states allowing for assisted suicide and one more that will allow it under a court review. AssitedSuicide.org is not the only site pushing for assisted suicide for the mentally ill. There are hundreds even thousands out there that are pushing for this societal change. Afterall, we have been told there is no known cure for mental illness. It is a lifelong battle of pain and agony. With that repeated over and over and the drive to accept that mantra in society, why would we want those to continue to suffer? Why not allow them to end their life peacefully? How long must they fight a battle that has no end? We must be politically correct to the numerous ideologies and therefore push for assisted suicide, lest we be labeled. None of that sounds right.

So, are we lost to a society that continues to diminish life itself? Have we lost the battle to address mental health when there are forces around us (the world even) that are pushing for the rights to die (to end life) vs the right to live? We push for cures and advanced treatments of cancer, but not mental health. We push for cures to rare diseases, but not mental health. We push for cures to heart disease with no patient accountability but not mental health. We push for advancements in plastic surgery but not mental health. We push for cures to nail fungus even but not mental health.

We push for death (assisted suicide) in spite of the advancements of disease management as noted above, but we do not fight for mental health living. I am but one voice, but I’ll continue to fight for mental health wellness, mental health LIFE if for no one else but Kenny. He deserves…deserved that fight. One day, Kenny, we are going to win this fight, this war. We are going to bring attention for LIFE and our pursuit to happiness.

I miss you, Kenny. Until we meet again one day.

If you know someone who needs help, call the National Suicide Prevention Hotline. Mental health is a battle worth fighting, for LIFE.

Accountability for childhood obesity

I had a hard time sleeping last night. So, like most people I turned on the television and started to channel surf. I happened to land on television program My 600 pound Life. For those that have never seen this program, it is about people struggling with obesity and while the success rate is less than 5%, the individual has decided to try gastric bypass surgery as a solution to regain control of their life. First off, this is not about shaming anyone, I was personally rooting for and think very highly of anyone wanting to take control of their life for the better. Second, this is one person’s observation, not medical endorsement of or advisement of the surgery.

Now, the story I watched had two sisters, both were traveling down this journey of the surgery. In the story line, of course interview are done with family members and their thoughts on the primary subject (patient) as well as their opinions on the personality and struggles of the person the storyline is based on. The grandmother of the two sisters was assisting with the surgery and living expenses of the two girls. The mother on the other hand, seemed as though she had done her duty and she had wiped her hands of the girls. That made me sad. But what I noticed during the interview with the mother, was the reflection of the photos while the girls were growing up. Each photo was of the girls eating something unhealthy, such as cake, ice cream, chips, large soda bottles etc. One picture was them around the age of 7 or 8 and at that age their girls were on their way to obesity. The mother had the audacity to blame the girls for eating so poorly as children. Since when does a 7 or 8 year old go grocery shopping for everyday items? My kids are 11 & 10 and don’t go shopping today. So, what on earth was this mother thinking? Obviously she doesn’t but this leads me to the topic at hand, at what point do we stop blaming,…well others for the choices parents make for their children when it comes to healthy eating? Has the PC era placed our children in jeopardy because we don’t want to hurt someone’s feelings with the truth, but it is ok to allow them to hurt their insides? I think many pediatricians today simply do not tell parents their kids are overweight out of fear for losing the patient (i.e. livelihood) or being labeled as someone who fat shames. If you Google, childhood obesity, you get more than 3.1million hits. So to say there is not enough data out there is preposterous. The Mayo Clinic shows that childhood obesity can lead to depression and other problems once reserved for adults, such as diabetes, high blood pressure and high cholesterol. The depression is what got me, considering the increase in child suicides across the nation. So, when and where does the accountability start? Have we gone so far to one side of the equation that we have created a generations(s) of children that are battling obesity, heart disease, diabetes and depression because parents are not willing to take accountability? When we rid our society of personal accountability, ie it is always someone elses fault, do we not create bigger problems, such as childhood obesity?

I cried when I watched the show mentioned above. I cried for the struggles both of those ladies were now facing and I cried for the children whose parents are in seemingly denial about the junk food they allow their children to consume and then make the excuse, ‘oh they’ll grow out of it’. Because, in the end, they won’t grow out of it? Those percentages are low. Instead, those children will battle social media bullying because of their weight. They will battle diabetes, high blood pressure and high cholesterol. They will battle circulation problems, shortness of breath and isolation. They will now face depression at earlier ages because they do not have a snow balls chance in hell to to break the mold their parents have set for them.

I cried for those two sisters and all those that children that will face a battle they should never have had to face as children and it was at the hands of an adult.

The Journey Starts…where?

My journey started years ago, but honestly don’t remember when. Oh, I knew I had fibroids. When I was pregnant with both my children my fibroids grew at the same rate as my kids in the first few weeks of pregnancy due to the hormones I took. But, outside of those two different moments in time more than a decade ago, I cannot tell you if my journey to a hysterectomy started before then. I know some women can tell you their entire reproductive start to finish but it was nothing I kept up with that closely until that one time of year when I went in for an annual exam, held my breath until I got the postcard that my pap was good and then forgot about it again. The most recent event or something I can kick start this hystersister journey would be a fall I took in late February this year.

So how does a fall lead to major surgery to remove organs? It doesn’t. It was a start to discover why I could not recover from my fall and the fact I was losing the feeling in my left leg. At first, the orthopeadic told me the fall recovery would take 8-10 weeks, including the swelling. At 12 weeks I was getting worse and starting to lose my balance. Actually, my leg kept giving way and I fell…again. So back into the orthopeadic I went. He decided a MRI was needed as I should have been completely healed at 12 weeks. So, off I went and got the MRI. Instead of the customary phone call to give me results, I was asked to schedule an appointment to talk about the results. Like most, sure I was a little nervous but nothing terribly worried about. That was until the doc pulled up my report and lead the conversation with, ‘you need to schedule an immediate appointment with your on/gyn’. He showed me the results and showed the fibroid tumor that was pushing up on the base of my spine and sciatica causing pain down my leg. He asked how quickly I could see my doctor and did I need his assistance to get an appointment. While I appreciated his help, I knew if I called my doctor with the importance he suggested I would be able to get in quite quickly. I was right.

Fast forward, one pap, pelvic exam and ultrasound later (all within hours), I was told there was not one but two fibroids spanning the width of me and my uterus was so big they could not see my ovaries in the ultrasound. Decision was made, hysterectomy was the solution. Now, at 47 and blessed with two children, I did not plan to have more children but will not lie, I had a small sense of loss. Loss of the ability to have more children. Some would dismiss this as hormonal and you may be right. However, I truly loved being pregnant and consider it a gift I was given, to bring life into this world. That is now gone.

But, I digress just a moment. So, push forward, my surgery was July 5, 2017. A complete abdominal hysterectomy, leaving the ovaries. I had the epidural to manage pain afterwards (great decision) and within 48 hrs I was heading home. All in all the hospital stay was the quickest and the easiest. Managing pain and trying not to get ahead of myself seems to be hardest part since I got home. At least right now. I keep waiting for all the other things I have read from other women, like insomnia, mood swings or depression. For right now, I am just tired as I have entered this #hystersister club.

Until next time ladies. Stay strong my chickadees.

My IG workout

As I sit here watching my son at track practice, I can feel the ache in my legs from my workout earlier this morning. Oh, it’s a good ache letting me know I did something new, possibly right and worked a set of muscles that had not been pushed before. I am certain that I’ll be feeling it more tomorrow. But, even with all that ache I am happy with the workout because I tried something new. It was not out of some fitness magazine or DVD workout but in my latest obsession, Instagram.

I follow people like Wes Whitlock, Cameron Hanes, Sorinex and Bethany Brenham. I follow them because they are realistic athletes. They hurt, they age, they make mistakes (and not afraid to admit it) and most of all they try new things. Unconventional things that through trial and error are just plain fun when you are tired of the same whole dumbbell curls and traditional squats. I can honestly say I am having more fun trying these new exercises than I have in years working out. Oh, don’t get me wrong, there are some pics and videoed that I laugh at and say ‘not hardly’ or maybe make some snarky comment like ‘eat a Snickers sweetie’. But overall I am having fun and isn’t that really what it’s about? Shouldn’t we have fun while doing this?

So, look these folks up or find ones you like to watch. Try new things while working out, especially at home. You can decide in the privacy of yourself if you like the exercise. Better yet, grab your kids and have them try with you. Show them you are vulnerable and not afraid to try new things. It has been great for me and my boys. They get in the gym with me, try new exercises and then we talk about what we liked or didn’t about it. I treasure those conversations each and every time. Catch me on IG as well and watch me try new things, make fun of myself but try nonetheless.

#healthiermechicadee

Random Farmer’s Market Observations

I so enjoyed the farmer’s market today. It was busy, which for locals is a good thing. I went because I love veggies and I also love to support local growers/businesses. Today, I got my fix of both. But for someone who is trying very hard to enter the holidays on a healthier note, here are some observations from today.

Pie. So as I enter the market, there she is, The Pie Lady. Fresh homemade pies all lined up just waiting for someone to buy them. Oh they called to me, like a siren I tell you. I kept looking at the table and would quickly look away as if too long of eye contact would somehow garner unwanted attention. It took all my will power not to go over and shove my face into one. Especially since the people that were there ogling said pies made it even harder to stay away. But who knew I would find pies at a farmer’s market?!

Bread, Brownies, And Cookies Galore. So after making my treacherous way past said pie lady, there two tents down is the artisan baker with fresh bread, brownies and cookies galore. REALLY?! I stop to listen to him talk about his food. He is telling a woman about the ingredients he uses, the care he takes in making each and every sinful-pound-to-my-arse brownie he makes. He talks about the gluten free double chocolate fudge brownie cookie he made up last night. As if that is suppose to soften the blow to the number of calories or fat that is surely in that cookie. Part of me, the vicious healthier eating venture me, wants to shove that cookie in his mouth just to get him to stop talking. My stomach is now growling, so I know I must pick up the pace on my shopping or I will hurt someone soon.

Veggies. Now back to the main reason I got up early to hit the market, veggies. I forgot my bag once again but remembered the Kuerig this time, which I’ll take the win on that one. With my tea in tow and making my way past the pie lady and baker tormentor, I see the goal, fresh local organic grown veggies. Now living here in the south we can grow vegetables longer, which is a blessing. Also, aquaponics is the coolest thing ever for growing fresh greens. Just take a look at these!

Thanks to Carrie Oliver for modeling the local greens for me!

Squash this time of year is awesome! Eat it raw or cook it up whatever way you please, but this stuff is great.

Local farmer’s can bring you the staples but they can also bring you new things to try. I was amazed at how many of the farmers had recipes cards out to try using their produce, dairy, fish or meat. They really make it easy to eat healthy (or not Pie Lady), support local business, and venture into new foods. Si check out yours soon and stock up for some local homegrown veggies as you enter into fall.

I stopped starving and started eating

So one week in from meeting with Brett, energizer bunny nutritionist extraordinaire, from Memorial Hermann Human Performance team. Remember he is the one with the smile that we give our children when we are trying to be patient with them! I sat, I listened and while I wanted to shove a Snickers down his zero body fat throat, I didn’t. Instead, I went home and got busy reading on protein I could eat throughout the day without carrying a refrigerator on top of my SUV.

So, results one week in? Here they are:

1. Energy. I found that my workouts for running got easier. I ran 8 miles yesterday and really muscle fatigue set in around 6.5miles. My cell phone ran out of juice before me, so I’m gonna take that as a win.

2. Packing lunches. While this is still a struggle it is getting easier. This is my passenger seat below. Note the order; water, small cooler, briefcase and purse last. I can grab any of my protein requirements easily while on the run. Yes, my job has me in the car quite a bit so having the set up helps me not crave Chic-fil-a drive through so much.

3. Weight loss. One week in and I dropped three pounds. After a year at the same exact weight, one week in on Brett’s nutrition regime, I dropped weight. Now, comes the hard part beginning week two and seeing if I can maintain the protein intake.

Don’t get me wrong here. None of this first week has been easy. I crave the ice cream in the freezer or the cookies I made earlier. My mother was making brownies on Saturday and I thought I might just run over my children to eat the entire pan! Then I attended our church bazaar and it is food paradise! Everything screamed fall comfort food. Luckily, I kept busy volunteering so I walked a lot. This morning I am craving Starbuck’s lemon pound cake-I know it is because I am hungry. Hungry because my body is burning calories and my protein shake from earlier is wearing off.

So, I’ll end for now, grab my hard boiled eggs (I love egg whites) and keep moving. Oh the picture below is what happened this past week. In my hyper awareness to get my snack bag, my Kuerig spent the day on my car. #healthiermechicadee

Calorie minimums

So in my beat down with Brett, you remember the energetic nutritionist, he told me I need to increase my protein intake and up the number of calories from what I have been doing. Sounds easy doesn’t it? Well let me tell you something it isn’t! I am logging my food intake and coming up short- heck I even had a cookie ok more than one today. When I walked away Monday I was pretty sure I could easily handle this new change in diet. After all, Brett told me to eat more, who wouldn’t want to hear that.

What are some of your strategies when it comes to increasing your protein and healthy calorie intake?

Pretty sure nutritionist Brett did not include this on my ‘yes’ sheet

I Thought I Was Fit

My first blog entry. Talk about writers block. I sat here awhile even wondering, where does one start? Where does one even begin to talk about their journey to a healthier version of me? Well, let’s start at the beginning, as most people would say.

Well, let’s just say I’ve been on a health journey for awhile. About a year ago I tried the Advocare 24 Day Challenge. Stuck to it and was religious about the process. Day 25 rolled around and I had not absolutely nothing. Zero, zilch, nada. Big EGG. I had lost inches but my weight stayed the same. Trying to stay positive and tell myself at my age, it would be baby steps now to get back to a healthier version of me.

Fast forward, after one year I’m still the same weight. I fluctuate up and down but overall, exactly the same. My boss, who is COO of Memorial Hermann Ambulatory Services and also a IronMan competitor, kept telling me I needed to go see the nutritionist at the Memorial Hermann IronMan (Human Performance). I politely smiled when he first suggested it, gritted my teeth the second and by the third time (which was only recently) did I finally let down the guard a little to say okay. Mainly, I thought if I just said yes, he would stop asking me if I had gone. My fear of course was walking into a place filled with super duper lean muscle triathletes and size 2 Barbi dolls. Who has time for that noise? NOT ME! So I put it off, again. Until now.

BODPOD : My first appointment I scheduled myself for the BodPod and nutrition counseling. I heard from Brett Singer, Nutrition Extraordinaire. That’s not really his title, but he has a slew of initials after his name and more titles in Sports Nutrition that I can count. He also is an adjunct professor and head sports nutritionist for the Skeeters and Houston Baptist University. Sure, that’s nothing to be intimated about. (insert rolling eyes here) I completed the necessary paperwork which consisted of a meal log and health history form. I had recently gotten a FitBit Charge2 for my birthday so it was rather easy since for the past week I had been logging everything like a newbie does with a Fitbit. I sent those off and took a deep breathe wondering if I could cancel. Brett quickly responded as one would expect from a supercharged nutrition expert at IronMan, giving me instructions for the appointment :

Body Composition:

The body composition test is taken using a BodPod.

No eating or drinking – 2 hours prior (some water is ok)
Women can wear: tight swim suit (without ruffles) or tri shorts and sports bra
Men can wear: Tri shorts, spandex or lycra underwear (ex. Under Armour), or compression shorts

OK, first off, I failed to follow the instructions for no eating or drinking. Totally forgot about this. Next, it’s cute he would need to remind me to leave my ruffle swimwear at home, because I really like showing that off! But the whole, partial nakedness in front of someone so they can tell me my body composition? I seriously wanted to cancel now and give my boss some choice words for even suggesting something like this. But I am soldiering on.

Monday, October 17 : I arrive for my appointment and the happy shiny young girl at the front greets me. She is all smiles with lots of energy. Sure, deep down inside I want to hit her, but instead I smile back and take the clipboard she has handed me for some additional paperwork to complete. I’m not there long and Brett Extraordinaire comes to the door, ‘Ms. Collins are you ready?’ No I’m not ready you over zealous energizer bunny. But it comes out as ‘You bet! Let’s go’. Now, let me say, Brett is VERY professional. Upon entering the room he remembered that I had already given him the ‘don’t judge me if I have ice cream’ email. He goes through the instructions for the BodPod and politely turns his back so I can take off my shirt and be just sports bra and tight shorts. Trying to maintain my professionalism in all of this, I smile and take a step into the BodPod. It’s hard plastic and cold so when I lean back it totally shocks me and my professionalism goes right out of the window with a quick ‘eeeee, that’s cold’. I narrowly missed bumping my head on the top of the Pod. Yep, smooth I am.

Now, after having air pushed on me and Brett being ever so patient, we made it back to his office to talk about food. For more than a year I had been working on a caloric deficit. Hoping that I would drop a few pounds considering all the workouts I had added. I’m an early morning road runner. As I rambled on about my fitness regime and feeling rather proud of my FitBit tracking, I finished up with saying (and making a mistake at this) ‘overall I think I’m doing pretty good’. That gentle (and let’s face it condescending) smile came across Brett’s face, he slid my BodPod results across the table to me. You know you are in trouble when he starts the conversation with ‘No Ms. Collins’. As I looked down at the page the first thing that grabbed me? My scale at home SUCKS! because it has been wrong and wrong in I mean wrong numbers in the wrong direction. I made a mental note to myself, throw that piece of crap out the window when I get home. Second, was the big RED section of the table that gave my results. Brett was careful in his explanation and even was encouraging saying, ‘now if you can see you really are not that far off from the next level down, which I think is good’. Yeah, Brett, bottom line the big RED area and what you were not saying is ‘I’m FAT’. I’m not confident enough to share my numbers just yet, but while Brett never said I was fat, the numbers don’t lie. This is not social justice math, it is hard core, black and white 1+1=2 math. And it read way out loud, FAT. After my moment of silence, I’m sure Brett was talking, but I had tuned him out over the red on the paper, I focused back on what he saying. ‘Ms. Collins, you are not eating enough’. I’m sorry, what? Yep, I had heard him correctly, not eating enough. As he went on educating me, I learned that I had essentially tricked my body into thinking no food was coming so therefore, whatever was coming in should be stored to fat not energy. He asked if I had been struggling with my workouts on increasing my mileage, which I admitted yes I had been struggling. ‘You body is telling you to stop because it needs more

Brett, Nutritionist Extraordinaire, Patience of a Saint

food’. I proceeded to tell him obviosuly, I’ve got enough to live off the land a bit by the numbers he presented. Again he gave me smile that was now reminding me of the smile I give my children when I’m counting to 10 in my head because I’m trying like hell not to say anything highly inappropriate. So, I closed my mouth and allowed Brett to continue. He had some massive spreadsheet that he would type into from time to time. It looked all highly scientific as I’m certain most of the people are at IronMan. Then he printed out a short novel for me to read when I got home. In actuality it was only 6 pages with lots of big graphs. Again, reminded me of the things I do for my children to keep their attention. I’m seeing a pattern here with Brett.

So, now I am on this new healthier me journey. I return to IronMan today for a gait analysis, VO2 testing along with strength and conditioning consultation with an energizer bunny named, Allyson. I’m told I should be worried as she is tough. I’m just hoping Allyson knows that I’m old and I have more insurance than her as she prepares to torture me today. See everyone on the flip side.